A few days after writing my first post and I feel really comfortable typing here because at this point, I know it is safe to say that if my blog was a diary, it would be sitting on a deserted island with nothing but the sound of waves and chirping of crickets playing in the background. But hey! This is better than a diary because it is open for people to see. In an acceptable way. Kind of like the real life equivalent of sitting in a park and talking to yourself. People are NOT a fan of that. (It NEVER happened, okay!)
Now that I am done with my dose of randomness, let us move on to the subject I have in mind *drum roll*
Who are we? And who is it that we want to be?
*If you haven’t closed this tab and moved on to a video of tea cup pigs/ an article about your favorite celebrity’s diet/ Debate on the Salman Khan controversy (No judgement, man. Whatever floats your boat.) I would like to thank you (read “Haha! Suckaaaa!”. Please don’t go.)*
I think we all would agree that this the most important question we as humans face every single day of our existence. It is right after “What would you like to drink?”, “Do I really need a third helping?” and “Tu jaanta hai mera baap kaun hai?!!”. It defines how we lead our lives.
However, this question did not seem to haunt people as much in the earlier times. The previous generation seemed to figure this out pretty quickly. At least where I come from. It was clear. Everyone wanted to be academically brilliant, married, rich, sanskaari- Basically, Sharma ji’s son. People before that had even more clarity- All they wanted was to be a survivor post the age of 40.
Compared to this, we seem to change our minds much like Katy Perry’s boyfriend in Hot ‘n’ Cold. I mean, last week I wanted to be Lady Lyanna Mormont, Marshall from HIMYM, Amy Dunnne from Gone Girl AND a Teletubby. And we ALL do this. We do this with every movie we watch, every song we hear, every article we read, every celebrity we follow and every time we stalk our ex’s new flame.
Even when we are busy “wanting to be somebody” a lot of us are already working on being somebody else. There is no denying that most of us today, consciously or subconsciously, chalk out a person/ personality and pretend to be them all the time. All day. Every day. Throughout our lives. Minus the hours we spend being drunk. (That is when everyone gets to be confident, flirtatious and obnoxious.No shame.) The smaller the world gets, the more complicated and diverse this picture gets. Why is it then, I would rather be a part of this generation than any other? (except the obvious reasons like better life expectancy, better rights and Krispy Kreme.)
It is because we, collectively, are not afraid of probing into the former part of the question I started this rant with: “Who are we?”. It is a heavy question, man. And on most days, we do not even want to go near it. But somehow, while we enjoy the great spread we see at “Who is it that you want to be?” buffet, we cannot help but think if we can be true to that particular identity for long and that is where the urge to meet the real you comes and nudges you. It is senseless to think that you would have an epiphany and figure yourself out in one go. But even understanding a certain part of your personality- your true desires, things that make you smile, things you do only for someone’s approval and why- is a true achievement. In a game where choosing characters for a temporary period (a corporate slave, a hipster, a class clown, a player, a manipulative doctor who knows every single diagnosis in the world) seems to be a sensible option in the pursuit of happiness, meeting the real you and being cool with it HAS to be the jackpot. It is beautiful how one helps the other. And we realize that. Thank god, we realize that!
We see fathers who like to stay at home, men who like to dress well, women who love to bike, amazing single parents, children who question the concept of god and people who openly wear socks with sandals (unless you are one of those guys who grows one long fingernail, you are good.).We even have people who openly admit that they want to be a Roadie! I mean that is something, right? Never mind.
The reason I made you go through the trouble of reading all of this today is because I took time to understand this but I finally understood that everything we try to do/ be is because at the end of the day, we want to go to sleep with a happy version of ourselves (put down that glass of wine. That is NOT what I meant.) More often than not, a lot of things we think we want to do/ be are because we think we have to do/ be them in order to be happy. These acts are relatively easier to identify, all you have to do is substitute “Happy” for “Socially Acceptable/ Likeable”. This confusion is the sole reason we are not getting there. We are not meeting that awesome version of us that can have a TV series made on them (ANY day now!) There is no, I repeat, NO feeling worse than doing something you are not really into but are doing for the sake of something that qualifies as an exterior force. Explore new territories, meet new people, try new things, create new stories and do not stop yourself from trying anything out of fear of being judged. Because the next stupid thing you do might just bring you closer to yourself. Like writing this has done for me. 🙂